Strangers In The Night

I had the strangest night out on Friday. I certainly wasn't expecting it. God why do I feel as I type this so many 'night out' stories start this way - what's wrong with me for goodness sakes! Answers on a postcard please.

I honestly thought when I left work to attend my trainers leaving do that it would be a couple of civilised drinks with a bunch of her clients. How wrong I was. I stupidly didn't eat that evening - we all know that spells trouble and before I know it I'm involved in a deep and penetrating conversation about gay sex.

"GARCON. MORE WINE"

It is absolutely shameful how quickly my mind draws blank on the events of that evening. Which is a shame, for had I been more with it I might have noticed the bastard who stole my iPod. No I don't have insurance. The shits.

The following night (yes there's more) I was at a far more civilised affair. My friends engagement party, which was actually a lot of fun. I met my friend Richards' new girlfriend and managed to recall the entire nights events. However, what I didn't notice was the card that I bought them to congratulate actually had 'Happy Birthday' written inside.

"It wasn't Happy Birthday was it?"

Dammit and i've just realised I missed Jam & Jerusalem as well.